InStyle, Uncategorized

Free People Midi + Living Positively

Dress: Free People • Shoes: Vince Camuto • Bag: Rebecca Minkoff (currently 40% off!)

Madison Bickham Photography

Hello my peeps. The other day I was scrolling through my blog and insta posts and realized something… I am starting to look like THAT blogger. What I mean by “that blogger” is that I post a bunch of pictures of myself, talk about my outfit details, and write a brief/surface level update on how my day has been (*yawn*). This is not a bad thing at all if you do this and are successful at it, but it’s just not authentically me. Obviously, my friends and family know this, but I want my readers to feel as if they know me on a personal level even if they haven’t met me. So, I have been inspired to dig a little deeper and unleash more of my personality through my blog because I was starting to resemble a BB (basic bitch). Now, I can’t promise this will happen every blog post because that would be emotionally exhausting and sometimes I only have time for quick informative posts regarding fashion or beauty! But, I just want to put more of myself into these posts. Also, I’m working on giving ATB (All Things Blush) a little make over. So stay tuned for changes on my website!

All this being said, today posts features 2 things: 1) this adorable midi dress number by Free People and 2.) my personal tips and opinions on living a positive life. Links to my outfit details are under my pictures for you to shop!

Staying Positive

I often get people asking me questions about how I maintain a positive attitude and a smile for all of my client’s appointments every day. Here, I am going to list some ways that I train my mind to think more positively.

Choose It

Besides the fact that it’s part of my job working in the service industry, positivity is a choice! Some days the choice is more difficult than others, but you have to train your brain to create that state of mind. You can wake up in the morning and choose to be upset or miserable about something that is happening or has happened, or you can wake up to a new day and choose to change your state of mind despite whatever may be going on in your life. Don’t get me wrong, I know some people go through some really tough shit (me and my family have had our fair share) and I understand everyone has to go through a grieving process. But, no matter what you are going through, you can’t let those events alter your positive state of mind.

Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

This is a big one, ‘specially for me! As a blogger in a very saturated industry, it is very hard to not compare myself to others and this is honestly how I realized I wasn’t being very original through my blog. It’s easy to see other successful people and think that the way they do things is the only way to be successful, but boy is that wrong! You are successful by being genuine with both yourself and others. Social media can also act as a trigger for comparing yourself to others. But you must remember that you are only seeing peoples highlight reel through social media. That mom who looks like she has it all together, definitely has her bad days as well! And in my case, even though I post pictures of my perfectly put together outfits on my blog, I’m writing this post in my cat t-shirt and sweat pants with absolutely no make-up on haha. So, don’t let other people’s situations or their success steal your own joy! Personally, I use other people’s successes to motivate me to develop my own.

Cut Out The Negativity

This is probably the hardest one to do. Your environment can be teeming with negativity including what t.v. shows you choose to watch or what kind of workplace you are in, but above all its most likely the people you closely surround yourself with. Removing negative people from your life can be really hard, ‘specially when it’s someone close to you. But, if you surround yourself with people who are unsupportive, who mock you, or drag you down in anyway, you need to let them go. Being around these people has a certain feeling, like a heavy weight pressing down on your shoulders and heart. Anytime you leave this person you feel more stressed and down in the dumps. You cannot live a positive life with that feeling. Instead, I desire to feel refreshed and inspired by those I am surrounding myself with. Surround yourself with people who bring positive vibes to all aspects of your life! People who boost your confidence, encourage you in your career, support and respect your relationships, lift you up when times get rough, or inspire you to be a better person. Lastly, a disclaimer. We all have bad days, and we all upset each other every once in a while. So, the second you get in a fight with someone please don’t just cut them out (lol). That kind of stuff will work itself out, ‘specially if the person you are upset with is a true friend.

Life Isn’t Fair, Deal With It

I feel like now-a-days everyone wants an award or recognition for everything they do. So much to where they only do things for recognition and not genuinely from their own hearts. Something that everyone needs to come to terms with is that things are not always going to work out to your own benefit. It is just the way life works…. As humans, we naturally think selfishly. For example- when I have a client that needs their hair done ASAP, and they ask me if I can do their hair on Saturday. I tell them “I’m so sorry, I can’t because that’s my day off”. Then they say “Well since you love your job, can’t you just come in for me on your day off?” (-yes, this happens a lot). They aren’t thinking “Hm, Rachel works hard and probably wants to rest or has something else going on for her day off”. No, their first priority is getting their hair done and I can’t blame them! But, sometimes you have to take a step back and think of how your situation might be affecting others.

You Can’t Control Everything

I’ve had to learn this the hard way many times. It’s easy to think we are in control of everything in our lives, but we actually only have control of the way we react to the things that happen to us. If you are one of those people who likes to plan your life years in advance, then you’ve probably been disappointed a time or two along the way. I get it, having control brings a sense of security. But as you attempt to control people or situations that are not going your way, you lose control of yourself. Learning to let go and realize that God is in control will give you peace of mind when you are constantly stressing over things that are out of your control. The saying “Let go, and let God” is so true!

Let Go Of Grudges

We all have or have had them…We hold onto anger because we believe it will make the person we are angry at upset or regretful of what they have done. Whether you have been back-stabbed, bullied, abused, underestimated, or hurt, none of it is right, but you should try to let these grudges go because holding on to anger causes you to hold on to the hurt that the anger brought you. This is super hard to do, but when you learn to slowly let the anger go, you are freeing yourself from both pain and hurt. Some things will take more time to let go of than others, but please let go of the petty stuff.  If you had a falling out with a friend over something stupid, or are hanging onto hurt feelings from years ago, forgive and move on!

Count Your Blessings

Everyone has many things to be thankful for. Sometimes you just need to pull yourself away and simply make a list of things you are thankful for! This has totally changed my way of thinking. Plus, there’s something about actually writing them down with pen and paper that makes it even better. There’s this book that I got called “52 Lists For Happiness“, and it’s full of lists that cause you to reflect on yourself, others in your life, and blessings you don’t typically think about on your own. It’s almost like a journal in a list version (lol to journal days). I would definitely recommend it!

I hope y’all enjoyed this insightful blog post! Until next time..



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